No “Good”byes

With false courage on my lips
I kiss you goodbye
I won’t be cliché, I will not cry
Most of my heart is torn from my chest The biggest part you now possess
This hollow frame counts as your footsteps disappear
28 29 30 into nowhere
The glass fogs from the heaviness of my breath
I try not to breathe at all,
challenging death
The sun warms my forehead, pressed against the pane
Its rays energize and cultivate the strain
of my pain
Let me peel myself from the view
which has diminished in value
Without you
Must busy myself with work
There’s plenty to do
But my motivation is in the extra heart riding on a quest
Tell me can you sense your blood pumping in excess?
My passion and devotion flowing through your cells
Laced with the sweet secrets that we cannot tell
I’m getting weaker every moment my heart stays removed from me
My blood growing still as organs begin to atrophy
I need you to return quickly
and place it back inside of me
I trust you’ve taken care of it as you always do
But I need it to survive……I need you

The Hunt

I am flat on my belly
Tall blades of grass engulf me
Camouflaged, my cheek nestles against the earth
My ear listens to the music of history below the surface
The richness of the soil penetrates my nostrils
And entrances my mind
Adrenaline pulsating through my veins like heroin
I am high
To be the Hunter
And the Hunted
Painful pleasure to be had
I need to taste, to be tasted
My prey is near
My eyes tightly shut
Lashes mix and intertwined like branches of ancient trees
No need for sight
when the wind tells
the secrets
I hear his thoughts, his needs
The universe vibrates beneath his footsteps
Each heal to the ground
drums a pulsating call
Through my chest
Encouraging my heart
to continue its dance
My skin pricks and tingles
as the taste of the salty sea
and the sweet, dark confection
Of his flesh approaches
I salivate with anticipation
hips raise slightly
Palms press into the moist, cool dirt
Soon he will be within range
I will attack without mercy
No amount of pleading
will exonerate him
A jolt, thick humidity slices open and he is upon me
He is ON me
My hunger has weakened
betraying my senses
I am so very hungry
But I am now his captive
His thirst assaults
But I will not surrender
will not go without
Any longer
I strike back with the force of
a beast
backed into a cave
with nowhere to run
And then, the engaging fusion
water vs fire
Hunger and Thirst rival
Both shall have their fill


It was a spiritual revival
For my senses and
All other men ceased to exist
Even women became nothing
but mere dandelions
surrounding us
An encompassing halo
of delicate tears
Their joyous envy
sugar and salt
confuse together

If i could exude visually
how you heal my soul’s
battle wounds
my beauty would be
an assualt on all things
previously held in
high esteem for their
asthetic emaculateness

Because of this gift
that comes to me
wearing your form
I can no longer find fault
in our, once, defective world
For i have been favoured
over all other creation
No longer wandering
idle, naked, alone
through a thorny garden
Protected, I’m cloaked
in this royal fabric
That is your love

Blood Written

My youth writes this:

I’ve always loved you.
In my infancy
the angels told me to be patient
He’s running late, they said
My heart numbed
in an enduced coma
Until we both finally arrived at destiny You were not late at all
In my eagerness i arrived too soon Anxiously awaiting
what seemed a mirage
And those
who attempted to shake us
did us favor
Their rumbling blended us together
My thoughts were ur thoughts
Your needs equaled mine
Our desires identical
But this life is a test…

My tears write this:

Waking without you nxt me is…
Is like waking
with no blood in my veins
As if roles reverse
I’ve become Cilmi
Stricken by a love for Hodan
with such intensity
that the phrase ‘lovesick’
becomes only a sneeze of infatuation Feeling my soul’s preparation
for its last journey
I beg the Creator
of all things
to defy mortal physics
I plead for the sea between us
to evaporate and the earths’ plates
to shift atop one another
until so close, you can read your name etched into my heart
exactly where u left it.

My blood writes this:

I’ve become a mad woman
memories of you bring me
to such euphoric laughter
to the brink of suffocation
I’m reminded to inhale
Air over fills my burning lungs
and tears turn crimson
I wipe my face
trying to conjure your touch
Blood stained fingers
right hand over left on my chest
my face is sunken into the earth Begging, pleading for you or death.


Flying in Rain

I woke up missing you today
I stepped outside into the rain
It reminded me of all the sweet days
Your kisses like droplets covering my face

Closed my eyes but i didnt cry
Imagined i was a bird and then took flight
Across the ocean with you in my sight
Climbed in bed next to you for the night

I have to believe or else i’ll fail
To remember it isn’t just a fairytale
Our supernatural love is super real
Through time and distance it will prevail

we will prevail…